Had a somewhat painful memory recently where I realized I could no longer visualize the face of my ex-wife or her boyfriend (a one time friend). Some folks tried to reassure me that it was a sign I was starting to move on. Personally I wonder if it’s just a variation of PTSD or memory repression at work.
What was once the face I woke up seeing, is now sort of just a generic silhouette. I mostly just associate the thoughts of my married life with nothing more than pain and a sense of loss. It’s hard to look forward to the future when anhedonia has stripped the sense of joy or happiness from you.
I’ve kept up with my therapy and trying a different fitness routine that I hope will be more consistent but I’m still not sure what other things I can do to improve situations. Given that this weekend I started to feel the effects of a cold I’ve tried to improve my diet and eating habits. I may have to work on making a batch of homemade yogurt, that helped with my gut and overall fatigue.
