This will mark my first Christmas since my divorce was final and my second since my marriage basically ended. The depression is pretty rough, even if it wasn’t for the holidays but for me it’s never been particularly a fun time.
My parents separated right around the holidays and perhaps owing to my mom being Vietnamese we were never really big on celebrations. It was mostly just about having a simple meal with the family.
These days I realize I don’t care so much about things and gifts, it’s always been about spending time out of a hectic schedule. This year though to be honest, I feel like Christmas is just Dec 25th, another number and box on a calendar.
I hope to be able to get through the three days of the Christmas weekend and just survive. It sounds over dramatic, I know, but for me I think it will be a while before I’m ok with dealing with people during this season. I hope that folks who may come cross this blog understand that between folks who suffer from persistent depressive disorder, major depressive disorder or even just season affective disorder that the most joyous time of the year can for many be the most painful time of the year. To those in the same situation as I am, find that little thing you can focus on to get you through, find someone to confide in during the rough spots. Best wishes to all as the year comes to a close.
